In relation to introverts, there are a lot of stereotypes of varying degrees of inconsistency with the real state of affairs.
At the same time, they are often unflattering in nature: introverts are portrayed either as antisocial rude people, or as awkward quiet ones from shyness. As a result, many people, not wanting to receive such a label and being in fact introverts, try for years to appear extroverted, exhausting themselves mentally and physically.
What is an introvert
The division of people into psychotypes was introduced by Carl Jung.
There is a completely scientific explanation for the commitment of introverts to a solitary pastime. Their cerebral cortex conducts much more electrical impulses per unit of time than extroverts, and by limiting the circle of communication and the flow of impressions, introverts protect themselves from information overload.
The reasons for the development of personality according to one type or another have not yet been determined. There is an opinion that introversion is a consequence of previous psychological traumas. Indeed, quiet and non-confrontational children often get from more aggressive peers and they are more likely to become victims of abuse. But here the trauma acts rather as a consequence, and not as a cause of the development of introversion.
It is incorrect to identify introverts with misanthropes, as is often done. Introverts like to spend time alone because it gives them the opportunity to replenish their energy reserves, and long contact with people drains them. But they don’t hate people. Moreover, when communicating with people who are attractive to him, an introvert will be no different from an extrovert. If a person shows isolation, indifference or even unfriendliness, then this only means that he is tired of too intense social contact.
Finally, introverts, due to their peaceful nature and natural balance, can be ideal partners and spouses, and their tendency to think everything through in advance, perseverance and thoughtfulness make them excellent scientists and specialists in their field.
Rules for communicating with introverts
When interacting with an introvert, it must be taken into account that people of this type often have difficulty adapting to new circumstances and it is difficult for them to build social ties. But, if you follow some rules, then the successful establishment of contact with an introverted person will be ensured, and the interlocutors will have only pleasant impressions of each other.
No surprises
It is very important for an introvert to be prepared for what will happen in the next moment.
The unceremonious interference of outsiders in a premeditated course of events is unacceptable to him. An introvert needs a certain period during which he will be able to mobilize his mental strength for the upcoming social interaction. A warning about a planned event or meeting made ahead of time will certainly be appreciated by an introvert more than a “surprise” associated with going out.
Don’t rush
An introvert cannot instantly respond to the flow of information that falls upon him during communication. To make an introvert comfortable, you should periodically give him time to comprehend the phrases and questions of the interlocutor and formulate his own answers to them.
Show respect and interest
Introverts, in principle, are not prone to long speeches, but if it was possible to bring him to a monologue, then in no case should you interrupt him.
Such behavior is unacceptable in itself, and for an introvert it even looks like an insult. An introvert always carefully weighs his every word, and expects the same from his interlocutor. Tactlessness is unacceptable! It is important to show interest in the conversation by asking leading questions to help drive the conversation.
Don’t be intrusive
If the introvert answers in monosyllables and reluctantly, then this means that he is tired or simply not yet ready for long-term communication. You should stop in time so as not to turn for this person from a pleasant conversationalist into an annoying factor.
Give approval
Researchers have found that with intense social interaction, introverts have difficulty decoding social cues.
In other words, they are so focused on tracking their own behavior so as not to get into trouble that they do not have the energy and time to notice how people react to them. So, introverts do not always notice that others like them and therefore communication does not bring them pleasure. It would be the right move to tell an introvert in plain text that spending time in his company is pleasant.
Following these simple rules will help you get close to an introvert and become an indispensable friend for him.
